Our Infertility Journey: Erin and Andrew’s Story

Real journeys from real people. Infertility can feel overwhelming and isolating, but hearing from others who have been through it can provide a sense of comfort and connection. We spoke to Erin and Andrew about their experience.

Can you start by sharing an overview of your fertility journey?

We always knew we wanted a family, but I wanted to get my professional qualification first. I got that in 2016, so once I got that, my thoughts turned to a family. We started trying but didn’t get anywhere and just kept hoping it would happen. Initially, we weren’t seriously trying, then it became more serious with all the ovulation monitors, etc., but still nothing.

We went to the doctor and waited ages for a referral to the MSG. Then we had all the tests done, and it came back as unexplained infertility. Basically, we were told there wasn’t much they could do for us. Guernsey had recently stopped offering IUI, but we were told we might as well try Clomid. We did three rounds of Clomid, and nothing. So we decided it was time to stop wasting time and jump to IVF… this was March 2020.

We got in touch with Wessex, as you are basically abandoned by the MSG at this point. Obviously, there was huge uncertainty, but we were eventually able to go for treatment in July 2020. We had to stay for the whole process as self-isolation rules meant that if we came back after egg collection, we wouldn’t have been able to return for the transfer. We ended up with three grade A embryos. One was transferred, but on day 12, I found out it didn’t work.

We wanted to try again as soon as possible and worked towards September for a frozen embryo transfer (FET). My mum died unexpectedly not long before the transfer, so we ended up having to delay her funeral. The self-isolation rules meant there wasn’t time for my brother (who lives in the UK) to get over and self-isolate before I needed to go to Southampton. Maybe not surprisingly, given the extra stress, that cycle also failed.

We took a bit of a break and went again in February 2021. This time, we were in lockdown again, and I had to apply for an essential travel permit. That FET was also unsuccessful, and I was now out of embryos. I was broken!

Up to this point, we were paying as we went, as I was super private and didn’t know anyone who had done IVF to get tips from. We decided to try again and took a policy with Access Fertility. We went for a three-cycle package. In May 2021, I ended up having 21 eggs collected, resulting in 10 embryos. Because of the number of eggs, the risk of OHSS was increased, so I had to return to Guernsey without a transfer and do yet more self-isolation.

In August 2021, I went over for a FET. This time, the self-isolation rules had been lifted, so no isolation was needed. On 6 September 2021 (two days after the anniversary of my mum’s death), I got my first-ever positive pregnancy test. That little embryo is now my super sassy, super independent, amazing two-year-old daughter.

We knew we wanted another baby, and it had taken so long to make our daughter that we thought we’d better start sooner rather than later, as we were both getting older. I had a FET a couple of weeks after her first birthday. After the 12-day wait, I got my second positive pregnancy test. However, when we went for our six-week viability scan, there was no heartbeat, only a sac. We had to wait another ten days for another scan, and there it was—a beautiful heartbeat. That heartbeat is now my eight-month-old son. I cannot believe how lucky we were the second time around.

And what would you say were the biggest challenges you faced along the way?

The emotional toll of going through it all and feeling broken after each failure was really hard. Losing my mum during the process added a whole new layer of stress.

Financially, it was a massive strain too. We took out a loan, not really knowing how we’d pay it back. In a strange series of events, with my mum passing (and my dad having passed away some years ago), we inherited some money, which ended up paying for our IVF. In a way, my mum enabled me to have my children, which is a lovely thing to think about.

Living with infertility in the Channel Islands must have brought its own set of challenges. How did being based here impact your journey?

You don’t get much support after your referral to the MSG. Once you’re diagnosed, they essentially abandon you if you need IVF. Having to travel off-island for treatment adds a lot of cost and logistical stress, especially with flights and accommodation.

That said, the States of Guernsey do help with the cost of prescriptions, and you can get flights paid for, which is really good.

Were there any coping strategies or resources that you found especially helpful?

Initially, I didn’t know anyone who had been through IVF, and I was super private. As I opened up, hearing other people’s stories and getting tips was really helpful.

The Access Fertility package also made the process easier, as we weren’t constantly worrying about the financial side.

What advice would you offer to others beginning their own fertility journey?

Don’t wait too long to seek help. Push for referrals and ask as many questions as you need. Be your own advocate.

Financially, if you really want something, you’ll find a way to make it happen. Consider all options, like Access Fertility or loans. It might be daunting, but it’s worth it.

Finally, What has helped you stay hopeful and motivated throughout your experience?

The thought of holding my baby one day kept me going. Each failure was devastating, but I couldn’t give up.

Thinking of my mum and how, in a way, she helped bring my children into the world also gave me hope. It’s a bittersweet connection, but it’s one that brings me comfort. Thank you for being so open in sharing your story with us, we're sure it will be valuable and encouraging to others. -

“In Terms” - You don’t know until you know ;)

• IVF: In Vitro Fertilisation, a process of fertilisation where eggs are combined with sperm outside the body and the resulting embryo is implanted into the uterus.

• FET: Frozen Embryo Transfer, a cycle where a frozen embryo from a previous IVF cycle is thawed and transferred into the uterus.

• MSG: Medical Specialist Group provides emergency and elective specialist medical services for the Bailiwick of Guernsey.

• IUI: Intrauterine Insemination, a fertility treatment where sperm is placed directly into the uterus.

• OHSS: Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome, a condition where the ovaries swell and become painful, usually due to fertility treatments.